Before you become a parent, you never think that one day, an alarming percentage of your thoughts and free time will be occupied by poop and pee—and not even your own! It starts as soon as your baby is born, when you find yourself debating stool color and consistency or sniffing their diaper constantly, and it doesn’t end until they’re fully potty trained (years after which you’ll still sometimes wonder if they can fully wipe themselves without you). So of course many parents get excited for potty training. The milestone signals your child reaching a new level of independence, yes, but it’s also a glimpse at freedom for you from obsessing over your child’s bowel movements. And since many of us at Coterie have gone through this already, we have a few tips on how to make the transition from diapers to underwear as seamless as possible.

Discuss the difference

Whether you’re using diapers or pull-ups, or a combination of both, it’s a good idea to talk to your toddler about what underwear is and how it’s different from what they are used to. You can even have them try a few pairs on to get used to the motion of pulling it up and down if they aren’t already doing so.

Shop for underwear together

Make it a fun experience to get your child excited about potty training! Consider fabric and feel, since anything itchy, stiff, or even slightly uncomfortable is probably not going to fly. Choose soft, smooth, and even silky-feeling underwear with some stretch for the best, most comfy fit. And look for colors and patterns or prints they like—you’d be surprised at how much their favorite cartoon characters can act as an incentive to use the potty.

Pick a potty or potty seat together

There are so many options out there now, from potties decorated with various Sesame Street or Disney characters to ones that “flush,” with an actual flushing sound and different music and light options (editor’s note: we got one like this for our toddler and it’s definitely a vibe). Drumming up enthusiasm and excitement for potty training is what we’re going for, so ask your child for their help in choosing what they want to sit on.

Go commando

Even before you officially start potty training and even if it’s just for a little bit! While messes are bound to happen when your toddler is bottomless, this can actually help them get used to what it feels like to go to the bathroom without a diaper. You’ll also learn to recognize their body cues when they need to use the potty.

Don’t throw away those diapers just yet

There are some methods that advise parents to have a ceremony of sorts with their child at the start of potty training where they throw away any remaining diapers. From experience, we think a more moderate approach probably lets the whole family feel less pressure. Setbacks and regressions are so common, even if they’ve successfully potty trained, that you might find you still need diapers on occasion. Also keep in mind that it might take a few days or even weeks or months to get the hang of potty training before you can add in underwear.

Potty training has its challenges but it’s also completely doable! Even when it feels tough or like your child will be in diapers forever, just remember every kid is different and on their own timetable. Stick with it, stay positive, and the day will come when your child is running around in actual underwear while you realize you haven’t thought about their bathroom habits at all.